“It is strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely” ~ Albert Einstein

Isn’t this true? We all want have a wide circle of friends but when one or more of them do not act according to our wishes we become unhappy. At times there can be a misunderstanding with friends and negativity creeps in. Don’t we know in-spite of being  popular and liked by many friends there are moments when we still feel lonely and blue?😦😦 Having many friends can at times be stressful as we need to fulfill their expectations and perhaps even cater to their whims and fancies.

I wonder what ‘making friends with yourself’ means? To me it means not being dependent on the praise and admiration of friends to feel happy but to draw a deep sense of satisfaction and contentment from within ourselves. Whether it be our work our hobbies we do it to feel good ourselves and not to impress others.

We know of artists, painters, writers, gardeners, mountain climbers and scientists who spend a lot of ‘me time’ for fulfilling their passion. Spending such moments with yourself is said to be stress free, relaxing and energizing. Rarely are such folk ever lonely.🙂

Here’s what Henry David Thoreau has to say ~ “I never found a companion that was more companionable than solitude”.

 

 

 

About dilipnaidu

An open mind! Love to share my thoughts and a keenness to learn. An engineer and a MBA I had a wonderful innings in the Army and later moved to consultancy and teaching. My current interests are reading, music, growing culinary herbs, playing golf and yoga. I am serious on "Living life less seriously". A warm welcome to you be well and be cheerful always.

91 responses »

  1. negativethinkerr says:

    gr8 1 !!

    Like

  2. sindhoooo says:

    That’s a great quote… And I have it in my collection🙂 I love that cute little Budhhist monk🙂

    Like

  3. It is so true, wisely said!🙂

    Like

  4. Ankur Mithal says:

    Probably true. If we can stop living to impress others and, instead, live to impress ourselves, it would probably make you feel in control of your life. Perhaps that is what the ancient saints aspired to.

    Like

  5. Rose petal says:

    Man is a social animal. So, even though we might be happy being a loner for awhile, we still crave interpersonal relationships and praise. I love being by myself. Yet at times I crave for the company of my closest friends….that’s another kind of fulfillment.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      I agree man IS a social being. But there are especial momentswhen we need to reflect and introspect to develop our inner self. You are quite right being a loner is abnormal and must be avoided.
      Thank you and kind regards.

      Like

  6. I have always enjoyed solitude, and it is entirely up to me not to degrade it into loneliness.
    The virtual world is a mirage. A few days ago, a person signed off on FB , stating he was leaving this world for good. His post got more than 100 likes. He was found dead the next day. Suicide from loneliness.
    Just goes to show that we are investing time into the virtual world , but ignoring the real network of family and friends.

    Like

    • Dilip says:

      Hi Doc Sweety your comments are very well worded especially the first sentence. True we must not be be loners but interact with folks meaningfully.
      Please pardon my delay in acknowledging. Regards.

      Like

  7. Robin says:

    What great contrast between Einstein’s quote and the other two. I love Einstein’s quotes. Many of them of humorous. Being a friend to oneself is similar to a topic I was listening to on a TED Talk this week, which had to do with feeling worthy of being “_____” (you can fill in that blank with so many relational words and phrases). The speaker noted that a person must first show compassion toward oneself – or – as you put it – Make friends with Yourself. As always, you inspire me.

    Like

    • Dilip says:

      Enriching response from you Robin and good know you watched a similar theme on TED and could correlate the two. It is always a pleasure to hear from you And thanks for the encouraging compliment.🙂

      Like

  8. jbw0123 says:

    Hurrah! A post for writers AND introverts. What a wonderful picture. Makes me want to take a little snooze. Cheers.

    Like

  9. ssbonsor says:

    Reblogged this on God and Love and commented:
    I have liked what Thoreau had said about ‘solitude’ being one’s best companion. I am quite comfortable being alone with myself; time just passes so quickly. There are so many for whom being alone is a torture. I can’t figure out why?

    Like

  10. Kamila Pala says:

    VERY nice!🙂 Have a nice summer! Kamila

    Like

  11. Pamela says:

    Well said dilipji. But despite the fact that i like my own company, sometimes it makes me feel strangely lonely. Also i draw deep satisfaction in writing down my thoughts..my passion. But then , when i keep on sending articles to newspapers and magazines and not a single one publishes them😛 … I feel Ufff, what’s the use.
    You see i am a poor confused soul🙂

    Like

  12. So true. Your self cannot and will not abandon you, even when times are rough.
    Certainly a friendship worth nurturing!

    Like

  13. LadyBlueRose's Thoughts Into Words says:

    I like you blog title? or maybe the energy that comes from such a simple thought one could spin and weave to everyday breathing….
    I have been solitaire for as long as I can remember…my friends are counted on one hand I think sometimes though I do have aquaintances that I enjoy as I hope they feel the same.
    I was told once that life on Nantucket in the Winter show you the real reflection of yourself in the mirror…I stayed at a B&B there once, I enjoyed the quiet …
    You have given us a good read for thinking today, Thank you for sharing your thoughts
    and the quote …I like it
    Take Care…You Matter…
    )0(
    maryrose

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      I am delighted Maryrose for your frightful response. And so nice to know you are at peace with yourself in solitaire.

      The self reflection in Nantucket mirror is a strange phenomenon and I wonder how it could happen. In India we believe in meditation as the path to knowing our real self.

      Many thanks and remember you matter too!

      Regards Dilip

      Like

  14. So true. I just love the quote and pic🙂

    Like

  15. Thank’s for this post. Great reflexion and thoughtful. I agree. Se connaître soi-même, s’aimer afin aussi de pouvoir aimer l’autre. Mais ne pas se construire uniquement dans et à cause du regard de l’autre. Vivre en harmonie avec soi-même permet de vivre en harmonie avec autrui🙂

    Like

  16. lessandragr says:

    So true, so true!

    Like

  17. Doris says:

    All my life I had try to make others happy, specially my friends, it was so draining. Now I want to make my best friend happy-me. Great post, thank you for making me think.

    Like

  18. Tina Schell says:

    Very special thoughts Dilip. I really enjoyed the thoughts you’ve put together here. Excellent food for thought.

    Like

  19. Uzoma says:

    Namaste to you, too. You’re my third blogger friend from India and am very pleased to make your acquaintance. Again, I’m happy to follow your blog.

    Like

  20. Uzoma says:

    I couldn’t agree more. We are confident and able to face the world if we truly love and believe in ourselves. One needn’t be rich to make a difference. As an artist I take pride in having some ‘Me’ time. That way, I make room for new ideas.

    Thanks for sharing. Will be reading more of your posts.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Welcome to my blog Uzoma my friend and for the insightful response. Yes I can understand your belief in having a calm mind to stimulate your creativity.

      Thank you for stopping by. Namaste from India

      Like

  21. There is another quote by Dr. Wayne Dyer that talks about this. He says, “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.” This is a great post! Blessings, Liz

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Gracious of you stop by and give your lovely comments. “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with” is a meaningful comment which truly believe in.

      With kind regards and plenty of cheer🙂

      Like

  22. Loved the image Dilip and you are so right.. I so love solitude and I have enjoyed my own ME time… I am working my way around my good friends as I smile this bright 1st day of August..
    Wishing you some more pleasant time within your solitude moments and within your garden..🙂 I will be visiting your Farm shortly too🙂
    Blessings Dilip for your wonderful support.. Hugs Sue

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Always such delight to hear from you Sue. Yes I did note that you were on a rejuvenation break. Your time in your beautiful garden too is a meditative way to stay connected with mother nature. The good news is that the rain Gods have blessed by quenching our parched soil thirst and filling our dams/ reservoirs with water. The image on y headers is one of our nearest dams.

      Many good wishes, be blessed and hugs back to you🙂

      Like

  23. Breath of Joy! A nice new name for your blog site. You should write to us why you chose this name unless I missed that post.
    I enjoyed this reminder about being friends with yourself.🙂 Thank you Dilip!

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Charu that’s a nice suggestion which I had in mind but procrastinated. Logo’s to me are an important identity of a person or a company. In the beginning one of my students had set-up my blog to share my views on Management topics. But life as you know moves “Zig Zag” and I veered off to inspirational stuff🙂

      As such the present theme is on what I believe in and how I feel. Maybe I will be inspired to put a blog on it🙂
      However it will be no-where as significant as your theme and the way you designed it🙂

      Cheers and have a lovely day.

      Like

  24. BroadBlogs says:

    This reminds me of a saying: “Cats like being cats.”

    Doesn’t matter if anyone likes them, they are totally pleased with themselves. And they seem to be pretty content in their “cattitude.”

    Like

  25. Bams Triwoko says:

    Nice post, Dilip…🙂 Best wishes to you.. !!

    Like

  26. artourway says:

    so sweeeeet …

    Like

  27. VEDANT says:

    DEAR SIR

    HOPE YOU ARE DOING GREAT!!

    HOW TRUE!!

    I WAS SEEING THE INTERVIEW OF AN EMINENT MOVIE DIRECTOR MR. MAHESH BHATT.. HE WAS ALSO SHARING THE SAME EXPERIENCE THAT LONELINESS MAKES A PERSON MORE CREATIVE AND GIVE MORE POWERFUL TO THINK REALISTIC.

    REGARDS
    VEDANT

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Wow Vedant you are so right. A creative person generally does not get distracted by worldly matters and so likes to stay alone and reflect.

      Thanks Vedant I am doing fine with the blessings of Almighty and good wishes fro dear friends like you.

      Like

  28. Freya says:

    Beautiful thoughts and so true, however it seems to be – for many people – one of the hardest things to be friends with yourself and to be happy within.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      You are quite right Freya it is not easy for everyone to be friends with yourself. Yet I do believe from the wonderful adventure packed life you have you very much are friends with yourself.
      With kindest regards.

      Like

  29. kokilagupta says:

    If only people understand the difference between loneliness and solitude ….

    Like

  30. jannatwrites says:

    Thoughtful post and haunting Einstein quote. I think making friends with myself means being more accepting of my shortcomings and letting mistakes go rather than allowing them to be repeated over and over in my mind.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Your words “accepting of my shortcomings and letting mistakes go rather than allowing them to be repeated over and over in my mind” are so right.
      Have a lovely day.

      Like

  31. I really like this one, Dilip! I like having periods of alone time to write and create for my profession and personally too. Take time for yourself, my friend🙂

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      I am delighted you like this one Christy and good to know you do believe in alone time. For a creative person it is a must. I am trying to practice the ‘me time’ concept too – as best as I can🙂

      Like

  32. Binky says:

    It is quite true many people do not like to be alone with themselves. I think it is like you alluded to, that too many people are dependent on the praise of others to feel good, and therefore never like to be alone.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Its quite natural to feel good when others appreciate us but the problem is when they don’t we get disturbed😦
      We don’t have control on the other but we do have on our own mind.🙂

      Like

  33. Heta Gala says:

    Lovely message Dilip. We are true friend of ourselves🙂

    Like

  34. aFrankAngle says:

    All of us want to be liked … then again, I think of people who make it difficult to do so … and some of these people are also the ones who have a natural streak of nastiness. In the end, good people find other good people. … but to your point of liking self … absolutely … that’s the start, and in the end, the foundation for other relationships.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      Thanks Frank you have clarified the point quite convincingly. Yes liking oneself in non-egoist way is the basis of positivity and friends start liking you for yourself.

      Thanks you and regards.

      Like

  35. ssbonsor says:

    To me there is no greater moment than the ‘Bliss of solitude’. Maxwell Maltz has rightly said, “If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone.

    Like

  36. Swetank says:

    Hi Mr. Dilip,

    Thankfully I am my best friend. Currently I have developed an keen interest in medition. As being a 19 year old it is helping me a lot. I collect memories and preserve them so that I could enjoy them in future. There are many things I do with myself, it can be seen from the theme of my blog. I love experimenting.

    Pranam.
    Swetank. (from Being Bettr)

    Like

  37. It’s really important that we should be happy inside …we should find contentment in our own hearts. Happiness lies within us …I believe so…🙂 a nice post Dilip ….love it..

    Like

  38. fortyfive9s says:

    I am a unique individual who is very comfortable in my own skin but I am so very lonely.I love and need my solitude and I certainly don’t want compliments from others nor do I need their approval but I do crave “togetherness”. Someone to share outings with, experiences with, laughter with and of course “intimacy. I crave the love of another human who thinks I am special and I am so very, very lonely. I’m sorry but this has not been written by someone who has every experienced true loneliness.

    Like

    • dilipnaidu says:

      🙂 I agree with you entirely and its also true I have not experienced loneliness my self. Yet I have observed a few people who have balanced their togetherness with “me time” beautifully.

      Thanks for stopping by and I respect your frank response.

      Like

  39. seeker says:

    Thoreau said is well. There is so much to learn from solitude. And to depend our happiness on other people is cruising for a bruising. Excellent post.

    Like

  40. I loved this post!

    I agree with your interpretation of ‘making friends with yourself’.

    Thoreau’s quote is so true. Of course, one must understand the difference between solitude and loneliness.

    Like

  41. Thoughtful words which you elucidated with real world experiences…really appreciate…helpful reminders towards inner contentment which no one can bestow upon us unless we are happy within. Very nice post.

    Like

  42. Ben Naga says:

    Allein ist am besten.

    Like

  43. Very thoughtful post, Dilipji!

    “I never found a companion that was more companionable than solitude”.- Only a person comfortable in his/her own skin would be able to say this!

    As you say, not being dependent on the praise of others, doing what we do to feel good ourselves- that would be making friends with ourselves.

    Like

  44. N that is a great idea!

    Like

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