What does it mean to occupy the heart of someone? It could be your wife or husband, your son,daughter, sister or brother, it could be your student or your teacher, it could be your friend or neighbor it could even be a nobody remotely connected!

Any thoughts?
Cheers πŸ™‚


About dilipnaidu

An open mind! Love to share my thoughts and a keenness to learn. An engineer and a MBA I had a wonderful innings in the Army and later moved to consultancy and teaching. My current interests are music and growing culinary herbs. Love to play golf and do yoga regularly. I am serious on "Living life less seriously". A warm welcome to you be well and be cheerful always.

45 responses »

  1. drsuraiyanasim says:

    Our hearts are always filled….occupied by our loved ones and family…..and in the same way we occupy the hearts of many at a time.


    • Dilip says:

      True Dr Suraiya very true! I am sorry for the inordinate delay in responding. Trus you are doing well and here’s wishing you a very happy 2014 πŸ™‚


  2. K Sriram says:

    Why is there this URGE to occupy someone else’s heart? and where is this someone & where is the heart??

    The urge is because somewhere we realize that we are NOT ‘bounded’ and that we need to ‘expand’….

    Interesting brain research on the centers of ‘attraction’ ‘romantic love’ and ‘lust’ by Helen Fisher indicate that these three centers are different in the brain and therefore we are capable of feeling these three different things separately.

    you can watch her videos here …

    the common notion is that in order to ‘find’ a place in others’ heart we need to ‘win’ that heart through some ‘demonstration’ of how much we ‘care’ / ‘love’ , etc. basically the formula of ‘self-sacrificing’ to win hearts or being others centered rather than self centered etc etc…

    But does it really work?

    It doesn’t (though majority opinion perhaps is that it ‘really’ does! – of course in the short run it gets the ‘result’ but how long does it hold?). the reason is that we can make a place in others’ hearts permanently ONLY by becoming what ONE has the potential to become. When One is is Love with oneself, others have no choice … to give a ‘bollywood’ example – Sashi of English Vinglish realizes that all her ‘self sacrifice’ doesn’t translate into much in her own family’s eyes, till the day she learns to respect herself & loves herself for who she is. That day she ‘wins’ hearts effortlessly and this is the PERMANENT solution….

    lets look at it ‘practically’ as well… If we have to make an entry into others’ hearts the conventional way, how many different things we need to ‘accomplish’ because each other has a different ‘value’ that is close to their ‘hearts’. so u technically cannot be others focussed to get into their hearts because then perhaps u can make it into only a few hearts in a lifetime of effort…

    However, the other simple route is focusing on oneself – how do i make myself so respect worthy, love worthy that everyone ‘else’ has no choice?…

    Our Masters have said it well…
    1) There is NO Other to make such efforts
    2) The focus on Self & the efforts to DEVELOP (unfold potential in the Self) are the highest form of social service

    And what is this thing called LOVE? its root is from the word meaning Joy or Bliss. So i guess the solution is in the word itself – Be Blissful, and others just welcome u into their hearts without effort for Joy begets Joy, Bliss is infectious!!



    • Dilip says:

      Oh my friend brilliant again aren’t you ?? πŸ™‚ A beautiful analysis from Helen Fisher’s brain research to Sashi realizing only when she learns to respect herself & loves her inner self minus of ego. Yes that is PERMANENT.

      Thanks Sri for your time. Cheers.
      P.S. I loved the videos thanks again.


  3. I have traveled to many countries but only in India did I experience something special about all the people I met who lived there. I have never been able to figure out where it came from in these people. I think it is here in these answers. It has to do with the people of India and love.


  4. chiquitar says:

    I always say, “Love is a verb.” Meaning, it doesn’t matter what you say about it, or even the emotional feelings your have about someone. You don’t LOVE them until you DO something about it. I think it is one of life’s “secrets” I have been gifted with. And I’m telling the world =-)


    • dilipnaidu says:

      Hello and welcome. a beautiful response with meaning. What you say is perfectly true – real love is an action word and this is just what came out in a self-development program I participated in. So nice to know you have captured the essence of love.

      With kind regards!


  5. Hello sir !!


    I hope you remember this name “Pravesh” ??


  6. supriyadhende says:

    Hello Sir

    How are you doing????

    I appreciate this article… Hello kitty, which brings a smile on the face…

    It is so easy to say I LOVE YOU but it take years rather lifetime to prove your love…

    Love is like a banyan tree trust is the root, Understanding make it firm and forgiveness makes it grow and respect to each other blossoms it……

    I gave the example of Banyan tree with a specific reason. In Hindu mythology, the banyan tree is also called Kalpavriksha meaning β€˜wish fulfilling tree’. It represents eternal life because of its seemingly ever- expanding branches and people have great respect for it. It is said that at one time more than 10, 000 people can sit under its shade at one time. It is a evergreen tree.In the sacred Hindu Book β€˜Bhagwad Gita’ Lord Krishna has sung praises on the Banyan tree and hence the symbol of β€˜LOVE’……….

    Warm Regards
    Supriya Dhende


    • Dilip says:

      How nice of you to provide a fantastic response to the meaning of LOVE. Yes its so beautiful to equate ‘love’ with the mighty Kalpavriksha the revered wishing tree. I always been wanting to gather more information on this mythological tree and now you have rekindled my interest.

      Thank you and be well.
      Cheers πŸ™‚


  7. Trishanka says:

    A few words to express the very important aspect of life…I believe all the goodness rests in “love”i: in one way or the other.


  8. The heart’s a tricky one! Empathy, methinks.
    (And any post with Hello Kitty is bound to be good for one’s heart too :))


  9. Binky says:

    When they never stop thinking about you, and couldn’t live without you, then I think you occupy their heart.


  10. shahujvaln says:

    Occupy the heart of someone? – Hmm…

    If you think about someone when you awake in Morning, If you think about same someone before going on sleep, then someone occupied your heart…

    If you think about someone before doing any good deed, then someone occupied your heart..

    Before doing anything, If you think that how someone react in such situation and try to behave like him/her, then someone occupied your heart..

    When you start thinking about someone’s like or dislike before doing action, then someone occupied your heart…

    Does that mean, if you think about someone in good deed-in bad deed-in any action-in morning-in evening-in night-in walking-in every second, then someone occupied your heart? I think answer is straight NO…

    Suddenly, you remember someone and think to call him/her because you are not in contact since a year then someone occupied your heart…

    When you see some movie/drama, you lost in your past and remember your friends with smile whether you are in contact or not, then also someone occupied your heart…

    There are lot to say, but I think in general, if you have remembrance of someone then someone occupied your heart… πŸ™‚ What you say?



    • Dilip says:

      Welcome Ujval, thats a nice and comprehensively analysis of the intangible concept of ‘Occupy someone’s heart’. I 100% agree with your first three points πŸ™‚
      Thanks a lot!


  11. burgessart says:

    Hi Dilip, Maybe allowing others to be who they truely are. Best wishes, Robert


    • Dilip says:

      A warm welcome to you Robert. What you say is so true – yet most people may find it hard to practice. We need to build this virtue in ourselves.
      Thanks once again.


  12. anitapadman says:

    What does it mean to occupy someone’s heart – I would have to say i know someone had occupied my heart when i think of them every time i am happy, every time i am sad, every time i face a victory or a defeat. I wish and pray for their safety, i am scared and happy both at the same time for their presence in my life. I think thats when i would say, they are occupying my heart. When their thought comes to my mind before i think even about my own self.


  13. You need to give a part of your heart in return. RLS

    Sent from my iPad

    > >


  14. renu says:

    Loving someone one is much easier, but getting love from others is a blessings from god,..so I always value more the people who love me…


  15. So true! The rewards when we do open up our hearts can be wonderful. Thanks for the inspirational words!


  16. Sarin says:

    Be yourself, be honest, be nice – all is done πŸ™‚


  17. artzent says:

    If you treat that person with respect and love you will have a place in that heart


  18. Kindness.. to me, includes love, compassion etc etc. Kindness.
    Thank you, Dilip!


  19. Geetha says:

    What a lovely picture and a meaningful message too! Thank you, Sir!

    Empathy will help I think. Empathy is all about putting yourself in somebody else’s shoes and also walking in them and more importantly, it’s also about getting into somebody else’s heart. Especially because as Blaise Pascal said “The heart has reasons which reason knows nothing of.” And being non-judgmental is also very important?

    Thanks and regards,



  20. LOVE is the only word which occupy someone’s heart.. but yes its a difficult job



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